IN THE BEGINNING by Julie Jordan Scott
In the beginning, there was a question longing to be lived.
You see, once the heavens and earth were here and sentient
beings began to get hungry and thirsty and tired, the questions
which longed to be lived began manifesting in words such as
"Where is water?" or "What is the source of the most luscious
grasses, grain and vegetation to quench this gnawing in my
stomach?" or "Which woman will be the best partner to produce
the most productive, able bodied, supportive of me children?"
It's true, isn't it?
These questions popped into the minds of those living in
those moments either consciously or unconsciously. Next,
they listened to hear where water was flowing and went to the
source of refreshment. They solidly lived the question by
testing the grains and grasses and vegetation to find the
tastiest. Finally, they wooed and won a partner and procreated
and the 'In the beginning' meets another generation.
Laura came to me seeking something. She wasn't sure what.
She knew she was dissatisfied and at the same time, she
didn't even know the source of her funk. All she knew was
her overall mood was shaky, her enthusiasm was waning
and it was beginning to show residual effects across
all avenues of her life.
She could make out one thing: muddiness. "At least I
recognize the brown, murky mess in front of me is mud!"
Laura laughed to me.
"What words would you use to describe the mud?" I asked her.
Laura was quiet for a moment. I matched her wordlessness
with my own, breaking it after a suitable silence saying,
"Laura, close your eyes and just say whatever thoughts
pop into your head. just let all the words that speak to
you about the mud spring from your mouth now."
I could hear Laura inhale. In her exhale she intoned: "murky
hairy dark oppressive grayness forceful in its thick non-movement
shackling the truth as I hear it shrieking "muuuaaahhhhhhhhhhhaaaaahhhhhh"
mockingly, merrily, mightily as I drown in the muddiness mired muck like
a terantula with a sticky web in its wake or the really powerful web of
the black widow so strong and sticky that when I walk into it I know it
recognize it catch it as it catches me and I say to myself..
"Wait, there is something sinister afoot!" and I know that it is not so
sinister despite the vice like grip it is something unfamiliarly familiar:
it is the grades that kept me from the school I wanted to attend, the
boys who decided I wasn't pretty enough, thin enough, curvy enough.
It was the boss who didn't value me, the peers who didn't "get me",
the schedule that didn't honor me, the community with no place for
me until I finally recognize it's not the black widows gelatinous,
sticky wake that chokes and binds me, it's my view-of-choice and
disempowering decisions that hold me, stifle me and render my
destiny stillborn."
More silence.
Laura and I sat in the lingering shadow of her spoken words.
I watched as Laura breathed courage, filling her soul with this
new knowledge.
"So now what?"
We stood together on the precipice between growth
and stagnation.
"Live the question to the other side of the mud, Laura."
"What does that mean?"
It can mean a lot of things. For Laura, in that moment, it
meant breathing in the question just like she breathed in
the courage to continue to take the "mud" into something
other than what she saw initially.
It means not concerning herself with the answer instead
to continue growing as the level of understanding increases.
Martin Luther King said, "Take the first step in faith. You don't
need to see the whole staircase, just take the first step." With
each step into the question, you add to your experience. You
increase your understanding. You learn. You continue to
become what you were always meant to become. You bring
that destiny to life within your very being.
I gave Laura a simple assignment to nourish and nurture the
question as she lives it. You may follow this assignment as well.
After our session, Laura created a list of 100 questions - without
thinking, judging or considering what the questions meant or how
they fit together she simply wrote questions until she reached 100.
She used those questions during the next two weeks as
personalized writing prompts, in conversations with her friends,
in emails she sent.
She layered each question she asked upon her initial "viewing"
of "the mud."
Two weeks later, Laura and I spoke again. Her countenance
had changed from ashen, unsure and unsteady to one of
openness, clarity and excitement.
Do you hear, see or feel any of yourself in Laura's story?
Now it's your turn to tune in.
1. Craft a list of questions to ask yourself, aiming for 100 questions.
Don't concern yourself with whether the questions make sense
or are unreasonable. Sometimes the best inquiries begin there.
You can see Laura's list here:
http://www.5passions.com/laurasquestions.html" target="www.5passions.com/laurasquestions.html">http://www.5passions.com/laurasquestions.html
2. Incorporate one or more of questions randomly into your daily life
through conversation, writing, meditation or other spiritual practices.
3. Create or tap into a community of people who welcome discussions
where your path through the "muddiness" is honored.
4. Continue your study through reading, study and/or personal
coaching, mentoring, or discipleship.
In the beginning, there was a question longing to be lived.
********************************************
Julie Jordan Scott is the Creator of the Passion Crafting Method.
Bring Art into Your Business and Business into Your Art
http://www.5passions.com to receive our ezine or look into
Coaching and Training for All Budgets. Call 661.325.4116
or email julie@5passions.com now
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